My mid-semester break was 2 weeks ago. Prior to that, I have been attending classes, finishing assignments dutifully (although one was submitted a bit late), and thriving. But since the break, I gave been feeling shitty until today, so that makes it 3 weeks in total. Last week, I barely attended any class except for the compulsory tutorial on Wednesday. It could be due to my aching wisdom tooth (teeth actually, 3 of them decided to come out at the same time), or, this was maybe an excuse to get away from my behaviour.
The break was after I was finished with my menses. The feeling was exactly like I was PMSing. I didn't get it. Why was I PMSing 3 weeks BEFORE my next menses? It feels horrible. I am annoyed at everything and everyone and ended up pulling a moody face throughout the whole 3 weeks. I am easily pissed, and yesterday, just because my sister ditched on lunch with me because she was late to hang out with her friends, I stopped talking to her or even looking at her face. Or my mum's.
The thought of skipping this week's classes hadn't crossed my mind. I was so pissed lat night that I started writing on my bullet journal again, planning ahead of the week. But today, I don't even feel like going to class anymore. At all. I have been slacking with instagram work, with my presentation that is due in 3 days, everything. I'm even thinking of quitting work because I can't live up to the expected sales anymore. As a person who always seek closure from music sometimes, I opened up several playlists to find where my mood exactly is, including Rage, For cloudy days and the chill party, but no songs seem to fit what I'm feeling right now. It's like there are no good songs anymore. If I'm not mad, or sad or melancholic, then what the hell am I feeling and why? My appetite is going bigger as well. Ugh!
All that I want in my mind right now is to lay inside my room and do nothing.
Seriously, what is happening to me?
